Dear Neighborhood Dog Owner,
I'm not very fond of cleaning up poop, especially dog poop. I adore dogs and cats and birds, etc, but we don't have animals for this very reason, so you can imagine my total and complete disgust and anger at finding it REPEATEDLY in my yard, front and back. It's most enraging when I step in it mowing the lawn, especially if it's a fresh pile. So I wanted to send you this friendly note letting you know that if I ever find your dog taking a crap on my property, I will kill him with my bare hands, slice open his guts and make an intestinal garland across your front door with his colon.
Have a nice day.
5 comments:
Nah, totally appropriate, I think.
just a bit...cute zoo and bday pics. miss you.
That's what guns are for. I have a few dogs and cats that like to do that on our place but not anymore. One shot to the butt end and they haven't been back!!
I love it. Post it right away. If they get offended it's because they are guilty.
YES!!- I have a HUGE pile of cat poop in my bakcyard where the cat poops everyday - in the same spot. But the cat is fast. I cant catch him and call animal control. I cant call animal control because he is always asleep in the backyard and they wont believe me that he escapes. And I cant tell my neighbor because they are easily offended and the only people on the street not of the same religious affiliation....
What else to do but to kill the cat! or maybe secretly light the poop on fire on their front porch....:)
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